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Bored now.

[Buffy The Vampire Slayer]

Spoken by both Alternate Universe Vampire Willow (Season 3) and Evil Willow (Season 6) immediately before initiating mayhem12.

Jeff Stendec (August 12, 2004)

12/08/1998. “Buffy The Vampire Slayer - The Wish”
02/23/1999. “Buffy The Vampire Slayer - Doppelgängland”
05/14/2002. “Buffy The Vampire Slayer - Villains”

1 Okay, like so in “The Wish” Cordelia (the rich snooty girl) made a wish that Buffy never existed, right? So Anya (the venegance demon) was like a venegance demon (I said that) back then so she’s all like “okay then” and grants the wish and makes a parallel non-Buffy universe (which really seems like a bad idea) in which the vampires have taken control of Sunnyvale? And Willow is the head vampire, which is funny because in the real world Willow is a willow, meek and geeky? Anyway, that didn’t work out and everything returned to normal. So then in “Doppelgängland” Anya is up to her old tricks and pulls Alternate Universe Vampire Willow out of her world and into the “regular” one, with hilarious and bone-chilling results. And when Anya’s deed is undone, Alternate Universe Vampire Willow is put right back where she was at the time she was yanked, so she dies again but really only once. Then time passes, and the real Willow gets in a little over her head with her addition to magic and then her lover (Tara) is killed by Warren, an evil geek-type. This pisses off Willow enough for her to gobble all the “dark magic” books in the magic shop’s library and instantaneously flay Warren right after saying “bored now” not in the cute, sing-song way of Alternate Universe Vampire Willow but now one-octave-deeper in the hellbitch voice of evil witch Willow. Then Dawn dies.

2 Vaguely-related interesting side note: In Cintra Wilson’s “The Dregulator” column of February 8 2006, she indicates that Paris Hilton has taken to urinating regularly in areas typically lacking urine containment systems, such as cars, hotel corridors, and restaurant booths.

“‘I’m peeing now,’ she allegedly says, with a bored expression.’”

Perhaps if she keeps it up, she’ll turn incontinent. Go for the gold, Paris. “Peeing now.”

Tags: tv | two words