add | about | contact | recent
prev | next authors. tags. a b c d e f g h i j k l m n o p q r s t u v w x y z

party poker

I’m going for the grape juice.

A small portion of my posse’s university cafeteria discussions revolved around a theoretically edible drink substance called “Nedlog”1 (the exact opposite of "golden", apparently). The worst flavor available was a purplish fluid they called “grape” which I refused to imbibe, though my friend Paul “enjoyed” it: “Try this one, it’s horrific!” While consuming and/or avoiding the various professional food service industry liquids, discussions also revolved around a young woman I had recently taken a shine to, and the many ways in which I could obsess over her while simultaneously not doing a thing about it (these conversations themselves fell under this category, so I was gettin’ two for the price of one, there). It was was only natural that the two subjects (not chugging creepydrink, not initializing courtship sequence) would eventually cross metaphorical wires some early classday morning.

“Zzwhut? Whozzzs?”
“It’s Jeff.”
“ ... it’s FOUR A.M. YOU [expletive]2!!!”
“I know, I know ... listen ... I’ve given it some thought ... and tomorrow ... I’m going for the grape juice."
“I’m going to try it. I think I can handle it.”

I don’t remember if it was actually the next day I built up enough courage to finally speak with her, but Paul felt compelled to return my call exactly 48 hours later (when he had no early morning class and I did), expressing the exact same sentiment; Paul, too, felt that this noble accomplishment was within his grasp, without the baggage of the macro metaphor. This in turn begat a volley of early morning content-free phone calls, much to the delight of our respective sleeping roommates. The expression later morphed into a general declaration of determined intent in regards to dating scenarios, banal decisions, etc.

Jeff Stendec

1 After perusing the website, it appears as though we were being taunted with the endless ethereal pleasures of either NEDLOG “HI-LINE” Fruit Juice Beverage Base or NEDLOG Blended Fruit Drink Beverage Base. These are drink concentrates – I suspect that perhaps my alma mater was excessively “watering down” the Nedlog base because they had already hit the student gouging apogee for Sports Arena Rebuilt #17. Go Broncos!

2 Shit.

Tags: personal